This is going to be a different type of blog then usual. As a college student now. Have felt God work. So you are caught up with my life I am now in college and a pretty amazing one at that. It is called Pacific Life Bible College. For the week and a half of being here God has changed me. To come from lazy doing nothing but gaming or sitting there being inactive in my faith; now God has brought me to a place where I am challenged daily threw many obstacles. I am truly blessed to be here. God has brought amazing people in my life. People who support me and accept me... How amazing is God. My life constantly consisted in being in the background and hiding and being inactive. Think of the colour grey. It is boring not interesting. You don't want to be around it because it does not make any change. Back in the day black and white movies were huge!!! But then! The "Wizard of OZ" came out. People saw as an every day movie. Black and white and normal not changing. But when Dorothy and Toto walked out the door. BAM!!!! The first coloured movie! People's jaws Dropped!!!! Literally the crowd could not comprehend what was going on. Just like me; I in many ways was like that crowd. I was numb and bored of the black and white films but then God came in and showed me colour a new shade many shades! Yes I know I am a Christian but an inactive one. One who felt God and walked with him but never done anything really. But God brought me to PLBC for a purpose. To full fill my calling and to find out more of who I am. So the past week and a half I have been really struggling with being accepted and to be noticed. Let's say I tried to hard. ( but still maintaining who I am) to night after work I got to my dorms and went to the A Frame (which is kinda a hang out yet living area where every one hangs out.) so there was a group of people amazing people. Who where talking and I came in time to witness them start praying for the girls of the campus. I really felt Gods spirit fill me up when Emily(one of my friends) turned the topic to us guys and started praying for us guys to be strong and be warriors and to be men of God. After the prayer was done. I still felt Gods presence inside of me I paced I wanted to talk to people but I couldn't. It felt impossible to make a sound. I finally sat down at a table. Where Makayla (another friend) said " John your awesome." but I said thanks but never felt anything. After a little prayer God told me to get up and get out of the room. So I got up and stormed out.... Well I thought it was. What every one said is I was a quite storm... Haha I love you guys. But I followed beside the outside sidewalk and went to the field where Gods presence came upon me. I felt q battle being fought inside of me. I felt weak and unaccepted not courageous not a warrior. After crying for what felt like a half hour. God told me to get up again. I had to obey Him. So I made my way back to the A frame. I got to the door. I got my key ready( at this moment I did not want to see anyone.) I stood out there for 5 min asking God what are you doing. In that 5 min I ended up slowly putting my key in and out. I finally put it in and pulled the door open a little bit. I was about to close it when my roommate Charles came threw the door. He saw me my first though was ..... Ah crap... Now I have to talk my eyes are red he can see I have been crying. He said "You want to talk?" I said sure. We talked about how work went and what the Spirit of conviction was laying on me. After an amazing talk I told him. "I need prayer can we get every one to pray for me" then we went back into the A frame. There is when God worked his amazing love. I told every one what was going on. With me feeling weak unworthy. Oh and one thing that made me feel good is another friend tackled me and it was awesome. At this moment after every one encouraging me and supporting me. That's when I realized the loneliness the meaningless thoughts that surrounded my head were part of what the enemy wanted. He was scared that I was following God. And so they started to pray for me. And God made him self so present. A peace and joyful tears rolled down my face as I came to realize that Gods love is so present in every one there. I have always felt that no one cared about me except family and God. As I came from a life of rejection and hurt. But then As I heard there prayers being lifted to God a new passion was created. I was already commented to be "All In"( our schools theme) but God confirmed to me to be all in. An anointing of the holy spirit saying now your "All In" heart, mind, soul and strength. I want to say thank you to every one who prayed for me and I was to say you guys are awesome! And for though's who want to gain something out of this I want to let you know that, if you feel alone or unwanted there is a God who want to be there for you. If you feel like no one understands you. Think again. I want to pray for you and walk with you. The prayers that were prayed for me tonight have changed me. Prayer is a powerful thing! If you want to talk to me. You can e-mail me at john.kcyd@gmail.com or if you are on campus and reading this and want to talk I would love to! I have been where you've been. May God bless you. He Loves you SO MUCH!!! To quote veggie tales " God made you special and loves you very much!
